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The Three Laws Of Irony

(I like both UK and US humour by the way. No offense to any.) 

First Law of Irony

For every UK ironic humorous action, there is an equal and opposite US reaction.

Second Law of Irony

The acceleration of irony of UK ironic humour as produced by a UK comedienne is directly proportional to the magnitude of "funniness" of that UK comedienne, on the same ironic wavelength as that UK comedienne, but here directly (not inversely) proportional to the massively misunderstood side of that very same ironic humour.

Third Law of Irony

UK ironic humour at best tends to stay the best and any UK ironic humour in motion pictures tends to stay in motion pictures with the same boring ironic speed and in the same boring ironic direction unless acted upon by unbalanced but brilliant opposite US comedy, which is ironic. (Claire, 29th Jan 2004)

SHAZ LUVS EDDIE

Real Graffiti which (could create a thinking excercise) is defined by myself, as wording that uses hardly any good grammar, proper spelling (not that I would have any trouble here) or function to good use, which other than to be informed that

SHAZ LUVS EDDIE

doesn't really appear usefull at all at first. Real Graffiti is scratched, sprayed, drawn, marked or even carved into stone. Its stays there forever and it really has no uses in society apart from creating this idea I have here, whcih I call Artificial Graffiti (AG). Artificial Graffiti (AG) is based on using real Graffiti combined with intelligent knowledge of science, math, art, anything etc... references (this could be infinite). An example is to change the nouns but keep verbs, this is just a starter idea. It can get better the more you play around. It could be a good idea to show in brackets your reasoning to use such words or examples afterwards. Remember, the more real the Graffiti is in its -roughness grammar quotient-the better the contrast with the intelligent nouns or verbs used in conjunction. Centralise the comment. This also could be used to look at knowledge in a different way by using complex grammar with real graffiti spelling or vice versa, or it's just plain fun to do! The genesis of the idea is actually on the Harvard page (please see this page!) Here are my examples so far and the first is explained:

CONDY LUVS EDDY

(conductors used with eddy currents)

Pauli was excluded by the principle.

Recycling is rubbish

Respect your relatives. Einstein was right

I WOZ ERE. AND ERE. AND ERE. By Particle.

Fermi is only half the guy he makes himself out to be

What happens if the singularity gets married?

GODEL NEVER COMPLETED HIS HOMEWORK

Everett wanted to rule the world (Untill he realised there was more than one)

Pets Lost and Found. Schrodinger's cat found dead and alive. Call: 12345

FERMY LUVS HIGGY

Dubya Bush to Shakes-a-Spear:

Dub, free from gross passion or of mirth or anger constant in spirit,

not swerving with the blood, garnish'd and deck'd in modest compliment,

not working with the eye without the ear,

and but in purged judgement trusting neither?

Such and so finely bolted didst thou seem - Shakes-a-Spear

Yeah I know -Dubya

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Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted. I have given you the right change?- Einy.

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On GCSE’s

The unexamined life is not worth living. Pass your exams or else.- Socrates’ (Socks ‘R’ These)

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Imagination isn’t imported knowledge- Einy

There are two motives for reading a book: one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it and that you can wack it one someone’s head if they are not listening- Berty Rus

The important thing is not stop questioning authority. WHERE ARE THEY?-Einy

All great change in America begins at the dinner table, I should know, Nancy decided on baby blue napkins- Ronny Reag

PYTHATGORAS WOZ A RIGHT PAIN IN THE ANGLE.

Not to be absolutely certain is, I think, one of the essential things in rationality, that’s for certain. Berty Rus

Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise up a bit, get a life and go to the pub why don't you?.- Beny Frank

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Ronald to Einstein:

Albert, facts are stupid things. This is a fact. Ronny Reag

Yeah but Ronnie, if the facts don't fit the theory, get a refund. Einy

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Our bodies are our gardens to which our wills are gardeners. Thou gardeners lie drunketh on thy lawn though, to which I say

“To be or not to be drunk. That is the question?”- Bill Shakes-a-Beer.

Total on Beer

“To be or not to be drunk. That is the question. Whether it is nobler to be sober?”- Bill Shakes-another-Beer

Ahh but, it is in justice that the ordering of non-alcoholic beer is centered. - Aris-T-Total

EDUACTION is WOT surVIVes when WOT AS been learnED has bEen forgoTTen. Wot WOZ It AGAiN? -B. F. Skinner, New Scientist, May 21, 1964

A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education. Well that's them's out of the way. George Bernard Shaw

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Just don't tell Einstein. H. L. Menckenism

When I'm working on a problem, I never think about beauty queens. I think only how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong, therefore my wife is wrong- R. Bucky Ball Fuller

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I HATE ingratitude (hic) MORE in a man than lying and swearing U SILLY SOD,

vainness, babbling, drunkedness,

or any taint of vice

whose REALLY SILLY corruption inhabits our frail ones (hic). Bill-Shakes-Another-Beer-Again

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I will keep adding more 7th Feb 2007

Smart Mass Putty

Smart Mass Putty (Smart Ass Putty) has a unique quality that it has different properties at 4 different time scales. Can AI do this? (Ring up your nrearest Wall Mart Consumer Services Manager to compare prices or minds). At long time scales it "behaves" (there's that word again)like a liquid, at interval time scales it behaves (woop!) like a plastic solid and at short times bounces like an elastic solid. At very short time scales (the impact of a high-speed projectile like your mother in law throwing a vase onto the wall because the water hasn't been changed) it starts to turn into a rock (so dont throw it at someones window even if it behaves all nice when its in its tin OK?). It is a dilatant compound this means it becomes solid while under presssure. Its viscocity or "resistance to flow" increases faster than the strain rate, (no, not faster than the speed of light lets not get too carried away now). (you can get this sort of effect with corn starch and water mixed together, I know believe me). It's higher moelcular weight in its primary ingredients or PDMS (Poly Dimethyl Siloxane)has a relaxation time (whoes' smart ass brain doesn't?) that is its characteristic because it is defined by that time that a random walk allows the chain to relax from a stretched state, via thermal vibrations (no this isnt a joke). Due to its Boric acid components (4th ingredient by weight) there are also transient Boron mediated crosslinks that arise from associated Boron links. This makes it think it's a piece ofsh**elastic when it seems like a liquid. (Yes, are you confused yet?). Good. The cross links are of a dynamical order so the material isn't locked into place permanently as this flows under certain conditions so at longer time scales the Smart Mass Putty behaves (woo that word) like a high molecular weight polymeric fluid (just incase you were intrested) and over very short time scales the putty behaves like a crosslinked elastic solid that shatters like your ceramic cup on impact towards the floor (too much coffee again). Thinking Putty. Did you get all that? Ok, You Smart Ass. http://www.thinkgeek.com(Claire August 2003)

The Toon Bit

The Essential Guide to Aliens book (above) is 1 inch tall!!!

Me on Beano, Viz, Misty and 2000AD

yup, Just found!

The BBC has an arty-farty/cartoony-loony section after all... and I didn't know, untill now. I intend to tell Thaleck about this. He is in dire need of "toon style" social exposure (that cartoon characters need these days, wouldn't you agree?). Who's Thaleck? The cartoon character on my site. By the way, Thaleck is looking for a toon job vacancy that requires a "flat 2D man" that can go into virtual toon spaces(and dimensions, no, no, I am not talking about Flatterland By Ian Stewart). Thaleck did ask Dr.Katz (in toon way) what he thought about his latest predicament (about not having been drawn or sketeched more due to his creators busy life (she has a life)). Dr. Katz repied,

"We all have an over self. Get over yourself."

http://www.websiteoftheday.info/2004/08/beano_viz_misty.html (Sep 25th 2004)

Website last updated Feb 1521932845ndthrdst 2020. What's been added? New thoughts on my Harvard page! Get there by bypassing my intro--->New section in the "C- This Story" part will soon include music lists that I like. Quote and Mega Foundation and second FTL page(see 1st c-this intro page above for it, then come back)

The Mega bit. The Megaboard hosts Gina LoSasso PhD (Psychologist) and Chris Langan (the guy with the highest IQ in America) have recently invited me to their Megaboard, TOE and Genius webpage forum (gulp!) Their website talks about high IQ and Creativity, everything about Intelligence! Have alook at the links to it on my links page.The art bit. Harvard page is now the second C-This Add On Bit but next moths (ish) I will be puttting the FTL Magazine that I contributed to many years ago (had changed hands many years ago but now is off line. It's a shame because it started up many pictures and ideas that I have here.) here (Ian will help me on it, the other Ian) as a copy (the whole mag) for now a link to one of its pages is here, it has Ian (that Ian), Ian and Ian on it--->Link to the Old FTL but Contributors page only The previous editor seemed to have lost interest. Here's the home page so far http://www.cthisspace.com/ftl/The mag includes old Space and Science Magazine news and my artwork. The FTL mag is (see last line)http://www.twbookmark.com/authors/30/2010/ Ian's favourite mag, which Ian? Yes that Ian. Now, look at the two pictures in this link that says Harvard ---> Harvard pics and second intro page , you will see my Earth With Sun on both. The science bit, at one point someone who I knew (still know) with a PhD called Stephen P Smith on the internet, re-wrote a few of my ideas out in a paper, without asking me 1st but it was ok. I thought he could have gone into perhaps more depth in some of it but [erhaps he thought that kept if it was simple it was more readable so it turned out ok. I kindly asked him if he could ask me 1st, if he used my ideas to be re- written in a paper next time, and that if they were included in a paper that he also threw some of the copyright weight in my direction and add my name. He did do, so that's ok, so very large proportion of my ideas from the last few years have contributed to a paper (as well as a few other people) that has just been published. So the very clever Dr. Stephen P Smith PhD who is good with format helped them through to this stage. The references to the books are books he has read. I haven't read any of these books but alternitavely I thought and created some of the ideas that are used. See the result of this athttp://www.emergentmind.org/smith.htm Also I've moved an old chunk of intro text from up here, to over/above the title "See This Add On Bit" quite far below this part because I felt like it. Link to my book cover (my art concept is the shooting meteor shower "The Day Of The Triffids" (see original image in c-thisspace) here#s the link>http://www.randomhouse.com/modernlibrary/catalog/display.pperl?isbn=0-8129-6712-7. The Kurzweil website moderators have recently ID'd their forum having asked me to launch it with them 1st! nd now I can post without the copycats. Ok, this page REALLY is getting too big isn't it? So now I have to get technical with HTML which I don't like, I might leave it abit longer...or you could go to the 2nd (C-This Add On Bit) page at...

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